2 min read

Morning Pages | 17 January 2024

Keeping myself above the depression line.
Morning Pages | 17 January 2024

Maybe the BookTube idea wasn't so good after all. If I were Hamish—17, with no commitments, living at home with parents—then I could BookTube to my heart's content. And play guitar and make guitar videos. And, and, and. But I'm not Hamish; I'm Hamish's dad. I have to bring home some bacon. Creative ideas are all well and good, but they don't pay. Or, if they do, it takes a lot of time and work before they get there. And time is not on my side. I have to be strategic about how I use it. That makes me sad, but it's just a case of acceptance.

Is there something else I could be doing? Coaching perhaps? Building a recovery membership? It was only last week I got super excited about doing that after listening to a guest's introduction on the Rich Roll Podcast, but then the rest of the podcast episode didn't deliver and left me feeling flat. But that initial rush of excitement was powerful. Being a recovery mentor would be good for me, but I don't know how to build that. My business skills are not well enough developed, and my mood swings and ADD get in the way. I'm sure those two things are related. If I were to become a coach, I would want accreditation. That's an expense we just couldn't manage. I'm sure that I'd be good at it, though. And I would get a lot from it personally, too. Food for thought if that Premium Bonds win were ever to come through or the Post Office compensation.

I'm committed to continuing. I have this daily writing ritual as a creative outlet and I'm keeping myself above the depression line with creative habits like this one and my stoicism videos.  


Waldmann Edelfeder Broad with Diamine Bilberry ink

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